The Playboy Article on the Tea Party

I can’t wait to tell my Baptist mother that her daughter is in Playboy.

This month’s issue of Playboy features an interesting article on the tea party movement and in particular, focuses on a particular group of activists, myself included. This is going in my bio:

Loesch is the sweet Midwestern goth version of Laura Ingraham. At the Conservative Political Action Conference she had a constant stream of such interviewees as Phyllis Schlafly, Ann Coulter, Ken Blackwell and Newt Gingrich. She fits right in, except she doesn’t look like a troll.

I’m glad the word “goth” was used instead of “emo” because we all know that emo is goth without balls. It’s a read over which I’m sure the regular group of slap-arse trolls will work themselves into a frenzy (don’t disappoint, I’ve hedged a bet!) because there is nothing more intoxicating and attractive than a group of guerilla activists who can outwit the long-established beltway game of politics – and they’re conservative, not liberal. Envy will abound.

I’ve said this before, but not as an epitaph, as a warning:

The reality is the Tea Party as we know it will cease to exist within an election cycle. Its ideas won’t go away, but most of its leaders will. That’s because most self-appointed leaders in this world simply don’t know how to win.

The movement is evolving into something much more powerful. Calm before the storm, people.

I’m now going to give you a 48 hour timeline.

Liberal bloggers go nuts. Headline: “Tea Party Co-Opted by by K Street”

Said bloggers fellate Boehlert via keyboard on Twitter.

Media Matters: “Tea Party Co-Opted by K Street”

Maddow: Squawk squawk “Tea Party Co-Opted by K Street” squawk

Point missed entirely.

The point being that K Street hasn’t co-opted jack, the movement has co-opted beltway.

Bwhahaha and scene.

Not only has this movement affected Democrat primaries (embattled Reid? Moderate Lincoln?) and dragged them back to center but now we’ve also co-opted K Street. Yes. We did it. No one except for perhaps a group at which I’ve thrown some daggers at previously sits down at a table and does anything they don’t want to do. Grassroots doesn’t compromise. You can’t play by the Constitution? You get bulldozed (Scozzafava). This is something utterly foreign to the left, who, in exchange for notoriety and favors, traded movement sovereignty and now operate as blatant shills for The Man. SEIU? OFA? The Craigslist ads advertising the hiring of activists to push the Obama agenda? That, ladies and gentlemen, is co-opting. They zealously look for weaknesses in the opposition so as to justify the collapse of their own convictions. The problem is that conservatives, by the very nature of being conservative and wanting to conserve individual liberty, have such abrasively strong convictions that when put in a room with the beltway, the beltway is devoured. Look no further than NY23 for example. Liberals run by K Street? Meh. Conservatives turning EVERY STREET into K Street? Beware.

It’s a nice notch in the tea party belt, another hill taken, another victory down, and I can’t help but smirk at its presentation in Playboy.